Sunday, January 23, 2011
i highly doubt my ability to give my all for a relationship again.
i'm tired of having to go through the whole getting to know people and letting them know about me again. it's such a routine, its basically becoming a chore to me. maybe this is the time people settle for someone who just loves them for who they are, one whom they're pretty sure wouldn't betray or hurt them such that they have to go through this whole tiring routine again, and maybe that would be they time they learn to start accepting people that they would not have looked at before, and not keep looking and waiting for "the one". but is that really love? i wonder.
what about me? will i suddenly feel refreshed and ready to look forward to the next relationship? i want a man who'd be able to love me irregardless of how i may become and just stay by my side and i'll stand by him too. i think i'll be a happy girl if i can find a man like that. but i'm disheartened. these people dont exist, and even if they do, i'm not as into them, i'd feel guilty to accept a man just because he loves me, but i dont love him half as much. that's wrong isn't it, to accept a man just for companionship and for love?
i think i'm starting to realize why pretty girls always go for the less than charming guys. it's all thanks to the cute guys they once dated, the one who broke their hearts through and through, till they, like me, have given up on loving someone, but learning to appreciate what it's like to be loved instead, and when they do, they'd learn to love the person back. and with give and take, they'd be a happy couple, don't you think? (:
why cant life be like the fairytales and happy endings in my korean drama? i think my mum knows that i've been really emo, telling her i'll probably never get married, or even if i do, probably only in my thirties, so by the time i have a kid, i'd be mid thirties. hahaha, better let her know in advance first mans. :| so she has to wait longer to carry a grandchild (or maybe my sister will be the first one to give her one) or maybe even my brother. :D then i'll have more nieces and nephews to keep me happy. (:
i'm tired of having to go through the whole getting to know people and letting them know about me again. it's such a routine, its basically becoming a chore to me. maybe this is the time people settle for someone who just loves them for who they are, one whom they're pretty sure wouldn't betray or hurt them such that they have to go through this whole tiring routine again, and maybe that would be they time they learn to start accepting people that they would not have looked at before, and not keep looking and waiting for "the one". but is that really love? i wonder.
what about me? will i suddenly feel refreshed and ready to look forward to the next relationship? i want a man who'd be able to love me irregardless of how i may become and just stay by my side and i'll stand by him too. i think i'll be a happy girl if i can find a man like that. but i'm disheartened. these people dont exist, and even if they do, i'm not as into them, i'd feel guilty to accept a man just because he loves me, but i dont love him half as much. that's wrong isn't it, to accept a man just for companionship and for love?
i think i'm starting to realize why pretty girls always go for the less than charming guys. it's all thanks to the cute guys they once dated, the one who broke their hearts through and through, till they, like me, have given up on loving someone, but learning to appreciate what it's like to be loved instead, and when they do, they'd learn to love the person back. and with give and take, they'd be a happy couple, don't you think? (:
why cant life be like the fairytales and happy endings in my korean drama? i think my mum knows that i've been really emo, telling her i'll probably never get married, or even if i do, probably only in my thirties, so by the time i have a kid, i'd be mid thirties. hahaha, better let her know in advance first mans. :| so she has to wait longer to carry a grandchild (or maybe my sister will be the first one to give her one) or maybe even my brother. :D then i'll have more nieces and nephews to keep me happy. (:
spin me silly, 3:16 AM.
