Saturday, December 31, 2011
Some scenes in the movie triggered memories that I rather not recall.. Because it is still hard for me to come to terms with some experiences that I'm trying to put far behind my mind..
Doesn't help that he was sitting behind. Urghh. Was wearing the happy mask the whole way...poker face ftw..
But oh well, everyone fell asleep at some point or the other.. Fail max.
feel like puking again. this is bad. why am i always wanting to puke whenever i eat?! :(
Doesn't help that he was sitting behind. Urghh. Was wearing the happy mask the whole way...poker face ftw..
But oh well, everyone fell asleep at some point or the other.. Fail max.
feel like puking again. this is bad. why am i always wanting to puke whenever i eat?! :(
spin me silly, 3:25 AM.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
why do emotions have to be triggered when i see you?
and i even lost control to how much i can drink, fml. first time i've ever vomited from drinking.
you're living your life so happily and here i am, still trying desperately to move on from the past. this is upsetting. this feeling sucks. it really does.
MELISSA, MOVE ON PLEASE. why do i have to tell my stupid heart and mind in order to let it go faster?! i'd do anything!!!
and i even lost control to how much i can drink, fml. first time i've ever vomited from drinking.
you're living your life so happily and here i am, still trying desperately to move on from the past. this is upsetting. this feeling sucks. it really does.
MELISSA, MOVE ON PLEASE. why do i have to tell my stupid heart and mind in order to let it go faster?! i'd do anything!!!
spin me silly, 1:03 AM.
Friday, December 9, 2011
nauseous.
something's really wrong with my digestive system lately. it's either i diarrhoea, have terrible stomachaches or i feel nauseous and burp endlessly.
fml.
so many things to do later.
1) write ALL the christmas cards that i wanna send to people i love (that's gonna take hours cause i spend like 30 minutes on one card!! :( )
2) pack my room up (this is gonna take 1.5 hours at least)
3) pack the toiletries and chargers into my luggage
4) top secret* (but it's gonna take more than an hour too :( )
5) put up the christmas tree with my brother and sister
6) paint nails
and i gotta do all these before 6pm...if i wake up at 10am, that gives me only 8 hours!!! :(
something's really wrong with my digestive system lately. it's either i diarrhoea, have terrible stomachaches or i feel nauseous and burp endlessly.
fml.
so many things to do later.
1) write ALL the christmas cards that i wanna send to people i love (that's gonna take hours cause i spend like 30 minutes on one card!! :( )
2) pack my room up (this is gonna take 1.5 hours at least)
3) pack the toiletries and chargers into my luggage
4) top secret* (but it's gonna take more than an hour too :( )
5) put up the christmas tree with my brother and sister
6) paint nails
and i gotta do all these before 6pm...if i wake up at 10am, that gives me only 8 hours!!! :(
spin me silly, 2:33 AM.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
its been pretty long,
i have yet to forget.
but i know what's best for me,
and it isn't you...
i gotta stop thinking of the past we had,
even though i have ever pictured how we'd spend,
christmas, new year and my birthday together,
for the many years to come.
i don't know why i'm feeling kinda emo again today,
guess it must be the PMS period again.
means... a hell lot of extra stuff to pack into my luggage now. it sucks to be a girl:(
i'm a survivor. i can do this! (;
this christmas, i wish for happiness.
let all the people i love around me be happy, find that one love that'll never break their heart.
this christmas, i wish for peace.
let me find peace within myself, let those who have been filled with hatred and hurt over past relationships, find peace within themselves too. to forgive and let it go.
i have yet to forget.
but i know what's best for me,
and it isn't you...
i gotta stop thinking of the past we had,
even though i have ever pictured how we'd spend,
christmas, new year and my birthday together,
for the many years to come.
i don't know why i'm feeling kinda emo again today,
guess it must be the PMS period again.
means... a hell lot of extra stuff to pack into my luggage now. it sucks to be a girl:(
i'm a survivor. i can do this! (;
this christmas, i wish for happiness.
let all the people i love around me be happy, find that one love that'll never break their heart.
this christmas, i wish for peace.
let me find peace within myself, let those who have been filled with hatred and hurt over past relationships, find peace within themselves too. to forgive and let it go.
spin me silly, 12:32 PM.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
oh. and packing my damn messy room too. omggg. that's number 9.
oh damnit. :(
yay don't think don't think don't think... the busier i am, the less time i have to look back! jiayou mel, keep yourself even busier!!!!! life is good, remember, life is good!
oh damnit. :(
yay don't think don't think don't think... the busier i am, the less time i have to look back! jiayou mel, keep yourself even busier!!!!! life is good, remember, life is good!
spin me silly, 1:15 AM.
its tuesday. 5 days left before the trip..
things i have to do before that:
1) transfer money to my friend for the pop up flash diffuser i bought from him
2) get a lens hood
3) settle 2 friends' birthdays
4) MY IMPOSSIBLE ASSIGNMENT. :(
5) charge my NDS lite
6) pack my luggage
7) put all the songs into my new laptop and then into my new ipod nano.
8) register for my new laptop's warranty because there's a problem with the registration webby
OH MY TIANNNNNN. too many things to do! :(
am actually worried i gotta skip 9 lessons... urghh.
累。
things i have to do before that:
1) transfer money to my friend for the pop up flash diffuser i bought from him
2) get a lens hood
3) settle 2 friends' birthdays
4) MY IMPOSSIBLE ASSIGNMENT. :(
5) charge my NDS lite
6) pack my luggage
7) put all the songs into my new laptop and then into my new ipod nano.
8) register for my new laptop's warranty because there's a problem with the registration webby
OH MY TIANNNNNN. too many things to do! :(
am actually worried i gotta skip 9 lessons... urghh.
累。
spin me silly, 1:08 AM.
Monday, December 5, 2011
havent blogged in a week.
just randomly realized its been exactly 2 months as of yesterday that we have broken up. and yes, i'm moving on with life. at least i think i am? finding ways to make myself happy (: but then again, if someone were to tell me that he's seeing someone new now, i'd definitely feel hurt still. i dont know why?
the pink crane he gave to me while chasing me dropped on my room floor this morning. i just kicked it under the table and left it there, till now. cant be bothered. sign of moving on? :\
its so fun to play golf with the rest. xf, kok, eddie, jas! took the chance to play around with my camera, however, i couldnt get the right lighting...it was too dark at iso 800 and iso 1600, so i used 3200... and to my horror... the photos ARE SO GRAINY. epic fail! :(
and i'm happy to see eddie and jas so loving together...envious too. why don't any of my relationships end up happily ever after? why do i keep meeting the wrong kinda guys?! just what is right??? i'm so sick and tired of the relationship game. cant i find one who'll stay faithful and loyal all the way? i'd definitely invest my all in that individual. so tired. urgh :(
5 days to san francisco! woohoo~! :P happy happy. but i dont have any wide angle lens to use for landscape photography. really upset. oh well... even though dad wants to get one for me, but i realized the cheapest one is also about $700?! thats 2 bowling balls yeah?!?!
gahh. borrowing is a waste of money too... $240.. :(
hungry. diarrhoea-ed the whole day.
crap. and victoria secret's models are DAMN HOT. gosh, face beautiful never mind, body even hotter.
ok. random. >.<
just randomly realized its been exactly 2 months as of yesterday that we have broken up. and yes, i'm moving on with life. at least i think i am? finding ways to make myself happy (: but then again, if someone were to tell me that he's seeing someone new now, i'd definitely feel hurt still. i dont know why?
the pink crane he gave to me while chasing me dropped on my room floor this morning. i just kicked it under the table and left it there, till now. cant be bothered. sign of moving on? :\
its so fun to play golf with the rest. xf, kok, eddie, jas! took the chance to play around with my camera, however, i couldnt get the right lighting...it was too dark at iso 800 and iso 1600, so i used 3200... and to my horror... the photos ARE SO GRAINY. epic fail! :(
and i'm happy to see eddie and jas so loving together...envious too. why don't any of my relationships end up happily ever after? why do i keep meeting the wrong kinda guys?! just what is right??? i'm so sick and tired of the relationship game. cant i find one who'll stay faithful and loyal all the way? i'd definitely invest my all in that individual. so tired. urgh :(
5 days to san francisco! woohoo~! :P happy happy. but i dont have any wide angle lens to use for landscape photography. really upset. oh well... even though dad wants to get one for me, but i realized the cheapest one is also about $700?! thats 2 bowling balls yeah?!?!
gahh. borrowing is a waste of money too... $240.. :(
hungry. diarrhoea-ed the whole day.
crap. and victoria secret's models are DAMN HOT. gosh, face beautiful never mind, body even hotter.
ok. random. >.<
spin me silly, 1:42 AM.
