Saturday, June 25, 2011
i've ever told him, that his good morning messages are like my daily fuel to last me through the day. but i realized i've been the one who has to wish him good morning first for a long time already, before he'll even reply, and his replies will all be about himself...nothing about me or what i'm doing...
i dont wake up to sweet morning texts anymore. it feels lousy. so i tried not texting him this morning...and he could tweet, he could foursquare, but he couldn't message me... hahaha. i teared in SPGG's bowling alley in front of kor... cause it felt like... i just didn't matter anymore. he didn't text me till near 6pm.
and all he can say is sorry. sorry. sorry. sorry. sorry for not spending time with you because i wanna focus on my bowling roll offs. its at 6pm. from after gym today till tomorrow's 6pm, he wont ask me out. he promised. he promised.
he promised me to make up for the failed attempt of asking me to be his gf by bringing me out for a nice dinner. it hasn't happened.
he promised to spend time with me after m'sia and singapore open. that all his time before trainings would be mine. it never happened.
he promised me after SSP, when i'm back from summit, he'll spend time with me. it never happened.
sometimes i wonder if promises were made to be broken.
my heart hurts. i don't even get to see him once a week, alone. he never asks me out. it'll always be bowling bowling bowling. bowling events bowling rolloffs double trainings...
i promised to support him, and i am. but it's till the extent he bowls and doesn't care about asking me out... its more about him than it is about me. 95% him, 5% me. it hurts. i know he needs alone time, i know he needs rest. i'm already being very very understanding of him...but has it ever occured to him... that his gf needs some of his love too? :'( i feel so.... its like... how much of my daily life does he even know?
its' the pms. it's the pms... come on mel... this was your choice. you love him. you loved the old free cute romantic him...the one who folded you paper crane and camped in school for you, the one who made you ginseng drink when you were sick, the one who held your hands even when he's out with his clique, the one... who doesn't do any of these anymore...
you made your choice to be his girlfriend... but it gets so tiring sometimes i don't know what to do...
sports leaders from summit 2011, are the bestest bunch of people i've ever met. they are enthu, active, and all garang! had quite abit of fun today, though my legs arent working now.
and i keep bumping into IAN, ken and david this week. first at mount faber. now at spgg...
i dont wake up to sweet morning texts anymore. it feels lousy. so i tried not texting him this morning...and he could tweet, he could foursquare, but he couldn't message me... hahaha. i teared in SPGG's bowling alley in front of kor... cause it felt like... i just didn't matter anymore. he didn't text me till near 6pm.
and all he can say is sorry. sorry. sorry. sorry. sorry for not spending time with you because i wanna focus on my bowling roll offs. its at 6pm. from after gym today till tomorrow's 6pm, he wont ask me out. he promised. he promised.
he promised me to make up for the failed attempt of asking me to be his gf by bringing me out for a nice dinner. it hasn't happened.
he promised to spend time with me after m'sia and singapore open. that all his time before trainings would be mine. it never happened.
he promised me after SSP, when i'm back from summit, he'll spend time with me. it never happened.
sometimes i wonder if promises were made to be broken.
my heart hurts. i don't even get to see him once a week, alone. he never asks me out. it'll always be bowling bowling bowling. bowling events bowling rolloffs double trainings...
i promised to support him, and i am. but it's till the extent he bowls and doesn't care about asking me out... its more about him than it is about me. 95% him, 5% me. it hurts. i know he needs alone time, i know he needs rest. i'm already being very very understanding of him...but has it ever occured to him... that his gf needs some of his love too? :'( i feel so.... its like... how much of my daily life does he even know?
its' the pms. it's the pms... come on mel... this was your choice. you love him. you loved the old free cute romantic him...the one who folded you paper crane and camped in school for you, the one who made you ginseng drink when you were sick, the one who held your hands even when he's out with his clique, the one... who doesn't do any of these anymore...
you made your choice to be his girlfriend... but it gets so tiring sometimes i don't know what to do...
sports leaders from summit 2011, are the bestest bunch of people i've ever met. they are enthu, active, and all garang! had quite abit of fun today, though my legs arent working now.
and i keep bumping into IAN, ken and david this week. first at mount faber. now at spgg...
spin me silly, 3:35 AM.
